The. Final. Word. On the Grammys.

Since I’m already in a bad mood about Dwayne McDuffie, I may as well do this once and for all.

There’s a reason I steered clear of the Grammys. There’s nothing about them that I haven’t said already. Numerous times. It was time to let it go and move.

And then Steve Stoute had to go and open his yap.

There’s no way I’m reprinting his entire open letter to Grammy organizers (you can do that here, if you feel so inclined). There are a couple points I may quote, but I have to start with the beginning. One of the very first things out of his mouth. One that says what I’ve been saying in much more sarcastic tones publicly for seven years:

I have come to the conclusion that the Grammy Awards have clearly lost touch with contemporary popular culture.

Where. On God’s green earth. Have you been?

Here’s the problem, Steve - it’s easily arguable that the Grammys never had touch with contemporary popular culture in the first place. The Grammys are actually one of the reasons this Blog - or at least its name - exists in the first place.

The Grammys, moreso than the Oscars or any other awards show, are a sign of corporate marketing at its most prominent. They always have been. You can cite Steeley Dan beating Eminem for Album of the Year or even Jethro Tull ousting Metallica for Best Metal performance all you want - the fact is, the Grammys have always been shallow, weak, and not worth the attention, venom, and vigor they receive for all the blown spots year in and year out.

Although, of all the years to point this out, you had to choose this one? The same year the only act to actually play their own instruments and attempt to sound original - The Arcade Fire - won Album of the year? The one good call the Grammys have made in years? Did you stop and think for a moment, Steve, that maybe the Grammys actually awarded talent and originality this year? I know, it’s a novel idea. Even I’m amazed!

To add ignorance to insult, you had to use Justin Beiber as your primary example. The same kid whose fans brutalized Esperanza Spalding's WikiPedia page in retaliation for their prepubescent god of shallow teen dreams not winning the same award. Real classy. If this is what represents “an artist that defines what it means to be a modern artist”, it’s comforting to know that mommy and daddy didn’t give in to junior’s tantrums this time.

Other than that, Steve, I have to congratulate you on beating a dead horse. Then having your way with the corpse before shooting it in the head one more time. Great job on being so topical and with the times. Not to mention revolutionary.

One last thing, now that I mention revolutionary: Lady GaGa pops out of an egg and people flip out over this like it’s never been done? Honey, Spinal Tap has you beat by 27 years. Hell, WWE has you beat by 21.