Rejection of Regurgitation, Part 01

Word out of Hollywood recently is Edward R Pressman is producing, Nick Cave is writing, and Mark Wahlberg could very well be starring in a remake of The Crow.

While we could discuss the individual merits of those contributions, the idea of “rebooting” The Crow should probably be discussed first.

The answer is, “No.”

There is absolutely no reason or excuse for this film to be remade. The excuse that’s been given is that they want to make a movie that’s more faithful to James O’Barr’s original graphic novel - or is it? Director Stephen Norrington has already been kicked off the project because someone didn’t like the “more faithful” screenplay he and Cave drafted. Be that as it may, let’s take them at their word just for a second. For the sake of argument, shall we?

The problem with that argument is that, save the exclusion of the Skull Cowboy and other factors (due to budgetary constraints), the original was already as faithful to the original as it could get. A bigger budget and improved technology, theoretically, would allow for a faithful adaptation--

--and no soul whatsoever. And therein lies one of - if not THE - main reason that remaking The Crow would be a worse idea than having Mel Gibson narrate a documentary about the Holocaust. The original work of The Crow was a man unleashing his anguish over the loss of his true. It wasn’t meant to be a cool series, or even the start of a franchise. The first film - and the tragedy that surrounded it - captured that emotion in a way that can not be duplicated. The Crow wasn’t a cinematic masterpiece or a technical marvel by any means, but every aspect of it came together to create a mood that certainly won’t be replicated by a bigger budget, more CGI, or any other excuse that Relativity Media can conjure up to justify this.

You know, there are 5 1/2 handwritten pages that this was culled from. Rather than let all that work go to waste, I’ve decided to break that down in to a series in and of itself. You just read Part 01. Feel free to keep coming back the next few days while we deconstruct the idea of “remakes” and “reboots” from stem to stern.